Reading Tom's latest post on The Heron Clan blog today, I fell to thinking , as Tom has been, on my identity.
For me the most interesting part is his understanding that what one does, achieves, fails in, looks like, thinks about etc does not constitute "me."
I have recently been trying on various ideas, tasting various points of view. This is my latest :
I am aware. What I am aware of cannot be 'me' (something like an eye cannot see itself, but that analogy is inexact.) I am this awareness, as far as I can understand. This awareness has absolutely no substance; if it had substance, it would be something of which I could perhaps be aware, so it would not be me. So we are at the point that I have absolutely no substance.
I am aware of a world apparently outside, but perhaps inside me and possibly not anywhere in particular; I am aware of thoughts, a body, sensations, emotions.
Whatever I am aware of cannot be me. So exactly what is this 'I'? Just the awareness, it seems.
Now, this awareness does not seem to be very personal. It certainly exists, but does not have any obvious location, nor does it really seem to belong to me. I just seem to be using it.
So is there any "I"?
At this point, my analysis comes to an ignominious end and I have not discovered how to continue it. I have not discovered any "person", but simply a world apparently containing this body through which the physical world and other bodies seem to be perceived , along with a collection of evanescent thoughts, sensations and feelings mysteriously seeming to be "mine" but not much under "my" control; all of which is subject to change.
Thoughts arise, but I do not seem to have much control over them. Are they "mine"? I'm aware of them so they are mine to that extent and by contrast with not being aware of thoughts in other minds. Descarts famously said, "Cogito ergo sum" I think therefore I am. I don't find this accurate, though the translation from Latin may have something to do with that. "I am aware, therefore I am" is my experience. Perhaps Descartes actually meant that? I'm no Latin scholar.
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Descartes did mind exercises with negativism.
ReplyDeleteHe tried to deny the existence of everything around him. So, in your idea, denying that the things he was aware of, actually existed.
But as every deity thinker he kicked himself in the ass. He could not deny that there was something that did the denying, and therefore had to exist. So he concluded, that he himself had to exist. Cogito ergo sum. Thinking, thus being.